Mexico

I am not a big fan of cars. Not sure if you have noticed, but they aren't my thing. So, not being into cars kind of means that I am also not into gigantic fucking trucks. I have always looked at those dudes rolling around in those huge trucks and wondered, "What in the name of God is that person thinking?" Well, this weekend I was one of those dudes. Crazy, huh. I roll up to my cousin's house ready to demolish Mexico in some serious, bachelor party action and am greeted by a raised, pickup truck with a ATV, type quad-thing in the back. Turns out that Joe, the dude driving us to Mexico is indeed one of those truck dudes. I drove all the way to Rosarito, wedged in the back of this dudes truck, and I swear to Jesus we listened to the entire Lil' Jon album. All of it, and then the Ying Yang twins greatest hits. Jeah! Not to be too explicit, but by the end, my balls were bruised from the massive speaker that I was sitting on the whole ride there. And that was just the ride there. Highlights later included. 1) Gettting pulled over by the cops at 8 in the morning for being too rad. 2) Paying our way out of said infraction 3) getting myself lost, literally lost, in a mexican bathroom and that had no lights. 10 minutes yall. 4) Hanging out at the dunes where all the other raised-truck, little jon listening-to dudes congregated. 5) deep conversations with strippers. And a whole bunch of bachelor party ish. I never want to hear another pitbull song again.